Why I Don't Do Twitter

There are two reasons.
One is that I am really nosey and would feel compelled to check everything posted by everyone I followed and it would steal many hours of my time. I just about manage to keep up with Facebook.
And the other one is I just can’t imagine anyone wanting to read the domesticated drivel that makes up my daily life. Here is what today would look like for example:

0645:  Please Baby it's Saturday. Go back to sleep.
0654:  Will regret it later but now am so happy she likes to pull all the shoes from wardrobe. Her fun = our few more minutes sleep.
0721:  Oh beautiful Saturdays with your precious lie-ins. How I do love you. And my husband who gets up with children.
0837:  Lie in over. Awoken to pancake wars downstairs.
0856:  I love my cooking husband. These are the fattest pancakes I’ve ever seen. Bravo.
0921:  Under table sweeping. I spend a lot of time down here.
0937:  Usual decision between shower or dealing with pandemonium. The latter won again, of course.
0958:  Trying to get Baby down for nap but apparently Scooby’s reading record needs to be signed NOW. It just can’t wait till Monday morning.
1013:  Darn it. Finally got Baby to sleep but R is fixing sink so all water is off. Missed my shower window – now in pyjamas for rest of morning.
1027:  Rocky found white board markers and decorated himself AGAIN. Have no high places left to hide them.
1045:  In playroom with boys doing what should be our weekly tidy up, except we've been out for the last few Saturdays. This is going to hurt.

1107:  Losing the will to live.

1119:  Taking a break with juice and biscuits and showing the boys Grocery Store Wars on YouTube.

1140:  Restarted playroom excavation. Had inspired idea to play Richard’s American Anthems CD while we do it - boys all pumped up now!

1146:  Oh yes. RunDMC and Bon Jovi are getting things moving!

1214:  Wow, best tidying session ever. Must remember to use that idea again!
1233:  Ace is playing peekaboo with Baby and she is giggling so much. Love their mutual love.

 1302:  Saturday = soup for lunch day, nom nom nom.
1336:  Post meal sweeping again, mixed in with a little wiping down of soup smeared children.

1355:  Shower is running again, time to be clean!

1418:  Ew. Just put Richard’s work clothes in the laundry. Stuff on them I didn't want to see or touch. Wish I'd saved my shower till after. Boak.

1532:  Walking along the prom. I love how Morecambe comes alive in the spring :)

1555:  Boys playing a ‘find every colour in nature’ search. Struggled for purple until Turtle pointed out bruise on baby's forehead.

1611:  Stopped for toilet break and to get cash for ice cream van. Too cold for ice cream really but the van’s there so it must be done.
1649:  Going to pick up 100 daffodils reserved at flower shop on way home. Will be giving them to ladies on the prom tomorrow J

1710:  Mix up - our flowers been given to someone else. Only unopened daffs left which look like sticks of asparagus! They won’t make anyone’s day!
1724:  Home and cooking tea while Richard goes on a flower hunt.
1749:  Now have bucket full of roses and tulips from Asda at 5x cost of daffs but they are very beautiful. Maybe God knew we needed better ;)
1758:  Baby ate carrots til she tasted potato wedges. Now all carrots are on the floor.
1804:  Now all potatoes on the floor & she is crying for more fish. Mental note: must make her eat ALL unfave first before giving her fave food...
1818: You’ve guessed it – time to sweep!
1851:  Move night YEH! Usually Fridays but had meeting last night. Brew, popcorn and many people under a blanket.
1932:  Aargh. They love new Karate Kid movie but keep hopping up to copy the moves! Be still children!
2027:  Have paused movie to finish tomorrow night. It is good but very long and R has work to do for church tomorrow.
2044:  Well, laundry mountain, it’s just you, me and a cup of tea. And maybe a Mark Driscoll podcast to keep my brain awake.

2150:  My quest for simplifying sock pairing is paying off. Everyone now has one colour each and life is much simpler.
2202: Still pondering the sad state of that last message and how excited I am about new socks that save time.
2327:  Mountain defeated and organised into beautifully cuboid piles. Ironing will have to wait till tomorrow though, too much to do.

See? It would depress me too much to read back on my day. And I think the only people who would appreciate knowing these details are other people who have similarly mundane domestic schedules. So if you’ve enjoyed reading this then.....


  1. Get thee a twitter account immediately! lol

    I think you have the best idea.


  2. Awesome !!!! says this domestic African mama of four under the age '6 yrs'


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