Lost Harmony

I remember discovering the joy of learning to sing harmony

Realising that I was no longer constrained to the notes that were written

But instead could dance around them

Finding new heights and new depths and new sounds in the music

The pitch of the song no longer mattered

How high the tune reached or how low

All I had to do was find the complementing note

And no song was out of my reach

Without it my voice had wavered uncertainly in solo

Questioning its strength and its ability to hit the right place

And making me want to step away from the spotlight and hide my attempts

For it was quieter than the inner voice that told me I couldn’t

But to sing with another

Who carried the melody strong and undoubting

Meant that I was free to try

Endless possibilities opened

The freedom to try and fail and succeed and succeed and succeed

Reaching for a note and quickly adapting

Split second opportunities to choose differently and to find the right one

As another voice carried the weight of the song

Nobody saw where I faltered

They only heard when I rose and seized the moment to blend

To lift

To complement

To enhance

I could grasp my place in a song in seconds

I didn’t know where it was going but it didn’t matter

I knew in each moment what to do

Where to slide into the space that needed my note

No limits, no fears, only new possibilities

And it made the melody sound all the better

It increased its impact

It sounded firmer and it drew people to its magic

Making a rich strong song

A confident song

That brought joy and comfort and direction to people who heard it

It was my place of truest happiness

And now you have gone

And I have lost my melody

Left with wavering notes that no longer fit or trust themselves to keep singing